98-pound positive thinking weaklings
Tuesday, December 1st, 2009I’m confused.
If positive thinking is supposed to be so powerful that it can bend the molecules of the universe to its will, magnetize money, eradicate disease, overpower anyone else who wants the same thing you do, and otherwise exert more control over the external world than all other forces combined…
Then why is it such a wimp in the face of “negativity?”
Why is saying to a positive thinker, “You’re a delusional narcissist” kryptonite to positivity’s Superman?
If being positive is so uplifting that it gets you a better job, improves all your relationships, and alters your physiology to make you impervious to anything shy of a nuclear bomb suppository, then why do you need to protect it like the Bubble Boy in a Swine Flu farm by running away from anyone who might brush up against your rosy attitude?
Positivity, it seems, is the 98-pound weakling at the beach.
Well, no more!
Now you can get my new positivity training program, Positively Positive, a Charles Atlas-like course for positive thinking wimps.
No longer will the Negativity Bully kick sand in your face and embarrass you and your scrawny, sunken-chested positivity!
In just 2.3 seconds a day, in the comfort of your home, you’ll use Dynamic at-Tension and build negativity armor arms, positively powerful pecs, LOA legs, and back that looks like a giant V for visualization!
You’ll go back to the beach and punch that bully in the face (metaphorically, since you’ll use Non-Violent Communication), and prove to your Indigo Child girlfriend that you really are on the Hero’s Journey!
It’s guaranteed!
If, in just 30 days, you’re not radiating so many positive vibes that the Dalai Lama calls and asks you to tone it down, you’ll get all your money back, plus all the money AIG got in the government bailout.
Order today by calling the phone number on the next line (which can only be seen if you’re not too full of negativity to render useless even this Quantum Physics proven program):

