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    You can have ANYTHING you want… NOT!

    I’ve tried, I’ve really tried.

    I’ve tried to be removed from every mailing list that sends me emails which make me scream. I’ve even set up filters to automatically trash email that comes in with subject lines that make my blood turn into liquid nitrogen at room temperature (a.k.a. “boil”).

    But, like messages that will allow me to get a mortgage that’s cheap enough so I can afford a house big enough to hold my gigantic new “manhood”, with a spare room for all the herbal V1agyra I’ll need to use it, somehow a few “You can have/manifest/attract anything you want” emails make it into my inbox every day.

    Yes, every day.

    There are so many people pitching this idea that, despite my best efforts, I get 3 or 4 emails assuring me that the universe is just a big Sears catalog waiting for my telepathic order, that “SCIENCE” has proven we are put on this planet to be abundant (if , instead of “so wealthy you would pick up that tab at a lunch with Bill Gates and Warren Buffet,” you’ve defined “abundant” as “obese”, then a trip to the mall actually supports this position), or that once you know the way rich people think differently than you, you too will become skinny and tanned and spend all your time posing next to your imported Italian sports car or laughing in the wind while steering your new yacht.

    The problem with this message is that it’s so compelling, it plays so well into our 100,000 year-old “how do I get what I want” brain, that when we hear someone suggest that it’s true and that they can teach us how to do it, we turn off our rational thinking process faster than we’d turn off a movie that advertises “Starring Paris Hilton!”

    We ignore that we’ve never met or even heard of one human being who has “gotten everything they wanted.” (And that the ones who have seemingly come closer than we have aren’t really much happier.)

    We don’t notice that the teachers themselves seem to want more and more and more… and apparently include in their list of wants: divorces, bankruptcies, children they barely see, and critics who think they’re morons.

    And then we reach for our wallets when the teacher tells us the price for this incredible (literally) knowledge of how to do what has never been done.

    I have only one message to pass along to the “You can have everything you want” teachers:

    Call me when you have cancer

    That’s my provocative way of saying, “No, you can’t.”

    There are times where we get what we want, and times where we get what we don’t want. There are times where we don’t get what we want, and times where we get things we never imagined.

    I don’t care how much I want to be the richest man in the world, the way that occurs require the confluence of so many factors that are beyond my control, it ain’t gonna happen. Hell, I could win Powerball every week and STILL not crack the top 10 in the Forbes 100 Richest People list.

    It doesn’t matter how much I want to be the greatest golfer in the universe, there’s only one Tiger Woods, and even the people who are #2 and #3 behind him, who practice all day long just to beat him… well, they aren’t Tiger Woods either.

    But back to the cancer thing.

    This whole effort to try to get what we want, to get what we think will make us happy, seems like it’s just a way to pretend we aren’t going to die… something that most people REALLY don’t want. And, I’m not sure if these teachers have noticed but, so far, everyone who has ever really wanted to live… has died. But only every one of them.

    At some point, nature will be stronger than anything we to do bend it in our favor.

    So, to the “you can have everything you want” teachers: call me when you realize that you’re on the losing side of that game… let me know how your visualizing, vibration raising, goal-focusing, universe-requesting, unproven treatment-taking — but HIGHLY PROFITABLE — magical thinking is working for you.

    Personally, I now know too many people whose last days were made miserable by their continued efforts to get something they wanted — more days — when there wasn’t any one or any thing that cared about their wants.

    I can only hope that in the end you can enjoy the truly magical thing about the universe, that it’s WAY beyond our ability to comprehend, let alone control.

    And now, please excuse me while I Feng Shui my office in an attempt to repel these unwanted emails.

    3 Responses to “You can have ANYTHING you want… NOT!”

    1. Stacy Says:


      I have learned (mostly & usually) to appreciate that everything you say about how that nasty misconception called “manifesting” isn’t true. I’ve experienced bliss beyond belief when I turn that focus of clarity onto some additional area of my life where I haven’t yet noticed the truth. I love you for giving me this gift. This week, alone, I have found myself reviewing and updating my resume, getting lists of colleges & universities that might hire and/or teach me, and starting to list again what I own and what I owe. And checking for actual $50k jobs is on the to-do list, at least. So is designing a course for Colorado Free University.

      I would love to see a blog about the gift that this really is.

      I know, the emails are a drag, let alone the well-meaning friends who constantly say what a “great manifestor” I am when I did no such thing. It would be a joy to read about the part that you gave your next-to-the-last sentence to:

      “I can only hope that in the end you can enjoy the truly magical thing about the universe, that it’s WAY beyond our ability to comprehend, let alone control.”

      It is and I do.


    2. Stacy Says:

      Theme Music for this Post

      Another Tricky Day
      by the Who

      You can’t always get it
      When you really want it
      You can’t always get it at all
      Just because there’s space
      In your life it’s a waste
      To spend your time why don’t you wait for the call

      (Just gotta get used to it)
      We all get it in the end
      (Just gotta get used to it)
      We go down and we come up again
      (Just gotta get used to it)
      You irritate me my friend
      (This is no social crisis)
      This is you having fun
      (No crisis)
      Getting burned by the sun
      (This is true)
      This is no social crisis
      Just another tricky day for you

      You can always get higher
      Just because you aspire
      You could expire even knowing.
      Don’t push the hands
      Just hang on to the band
      You can dance while your knowledge is growing

      (It could happen anytime)
      You can’t expect to never cry
      (Patience is priceless)
      Not when you try to fly so high
      (Just stay on that line)
      Rock and roll will never die
      (This is no social crisis)

      Another tricky day
      Another gently nagging pain
      What the papers say
      Just seems to bring down heavier rain
      The world seems in a spiral
      Life seems such a worthless title
      But break out and start a fire y’all
      It’s all here on the vinyl
      (No crisis)

      {Repeat verse 1.}

      (Just gotta get used to it)
      Gotta get used to waiting
      (Just gotta get used to it)
      You know how the ice is
      (Just gotta get used to it)
      It’s thin where you’re skating
      (This is no social crisis)

      Just another tricky day for you fellah

    3. Stever Says:

      We have a huge vested interest in encouraging magical thinking. Our entire economy is built on people believing in magical routes to happiness that lie outside ourselves.

      In the business world, of course, we would never say that we encourage magical thinking. We simply “help people make difficult decisions.” We do it by reinforcing bad thinking, pouring half-a-trillion-dollars yearly into saturating people with ad messages:

      Buy an iPod and you’ll be happy.
      Buy male enhancement supplement and you’ll finally be attractive to women.
      Stay in Trump Tower and you’ll be happy.

      The last thing in the world commerce needs is for people to pay any attention to whether “having anything you want” is desirable–because the answer is likely, “no.”

      The New Age Movement: Think and you’ll get what you want.
      The Business World: Get what you want and you’ll be happy.

      My experience is much simpler: Be happy. Then, once you’re happy, if you have any money, you can buy an iPod and you’ll still be happy. Isn’t life grand?





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